After having weird dreams for two nights I had a seemingly unrelated thought process this morning. However, unrelated as it may be, I can't stop milling it around. I tend to think, at times like this, that if I keep going over it I will figure out the answer. That rarely happens. So I decided I would get it out so maybe I can at least stop milling it around.
Growing up I had a pretty good childhood. My parents were happily married. These were my perceptions.
I was nineteen before I found out any different. And it shattered my world for a very long time. I guess parts of it are still shattered. I felt like my whole life had been a lie to some degree. Now, today, I am wondering. They (my parents) felt as if they were doing their best for me by keeping the ugliness away from me. But eventually I was bound to find out the ugliness anyway. And when I did I think it was more damaging than if I had just lived through it and learned to accept it in the first place.
There is not point to this really. I just needed to active processing.
But if you do know why I've been dreaming about huge houses, let me know.
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